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Normal's Overated.
sokmuiam a cynical person who hates orientation and the ridiculous rah rah atmosphere. shares a love-hate relationship with ku-ster and the piano. god should populate the earth instaneously with adults, thus skipping the absurd toddlers and squealingn babies fan of korean shows and the rude ah jun mas, secretly think bae yong jun is not bad looking. listening to classical music on the train is a waste of my battery. Dislikes babbling women who are not efficient.adores House. Thinks that friends are sometimes a burden Adores Xinyun immensely. Life is too short to bother socializing with people I dun like. You either choose the pill and live your life barely feeling your toes, or ignore the pill and accept pain as part of the life. Secretly clings. Sometimes. |
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random quirks
my student made a guess regarding my age and said i was fifteenmr ku insulted me by saying i look like david carrdine whoever dares to say there is a certain resemblance better be prepared for my wrath. plugged tagboard
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Design: doughnutcrazyIcon: morphine_kissed Do credit accordingly if you changed the icon. |
i wonder if i've had a nightmare last night but dun rmb it ..cos i've been plagued by a feeling of unease for the whole day.. like you feel uneasy even though there's nth techncially to feel uneasy about really..not a very nice feeling makes me just wanna stay at home and sleep but i have waitressing tonight.. anyhow, thank you mg and pris! for the keychain i really really like it a lot=D kellie scared me this morn by telling me she was hospitalized.. i tot she had a relapse or something scared the shit out of me ...thankfully it's just some stomach thing hope it doesn't get complicated ..i can't find you priscilla, where have you been the whole day?? JJ Lin Jun Jie, 林俊杰 - Killa, Sha Shou (杀手) MV (uncensored)
yah lah fine i'm sick....but you gotta admit the cinematography is extremely good... just thought of something you noe girls always like to ask the guys they like whether the guy has ever liked her ..as in, it's quite stupid isn't it like, if the guy says yes, he likes her, den of course it's happy ending but if the guy says no, it's not as if you will stop liking him right? so no matter what happens, you'll still continue liking him, den what's the point of asking? makes sense right? i just realize that something is going bad is going to happen on pris's birthday no lah, i'm not cursing you as in, i already noe my schedule for that day ..it sucks ..... 杀手 心情放松摇摆 在你三百米之外 数着心跳等待 所有念头全抛开 锁起来 进来 这美丽的悲哀 这是爱就是爱 全世界都不明白 心情放松摇摆 在你三百米之外 感觉饥饿难耐 需要你填满空白 锁进来 进来 这美丽的悲哀 这是爱就是爱 只有你明白 ehhh i love this skin it's nice isn't it? and now you guys can see what you're tagging go on tag tag! firstly exams are over! =D you guys only have one more day to go lah, by the time u see this msg tml you will feel as happy as i do too!!! eh, the split second show, ten pm on channel u..the music inside damn cool really who can help me find?? eh..really very nice okay okay actually got quite a lot of things wanna blog about yesterday i saw this concert thing on arts central den i saw feixiang singing phantom of the opera!!! omg, he's GOOD la can surprisingly so and for some reason i felt so proud that an asian can carry the tune so well compared to the opposite lead, his voice was so much more powerful, actually, more accurate, the girl isn't used to theatrical singing i guess yah, i really can't get it outta my mind -.-" wait..i forgot what i wanted to blog about le oh yah math paper seriously, there are days when you thank god you've been through the ANDERSON-CUM-MR-TTP drill..today is one for sure cos the paper was......really quite relaxing i dun think i've ever countered such a paper in Anderson before -.-" but still, all my functions and graphs were in a mess, cos i seriously aren't clear about them but who cares more like i can very proudly say never let Anderson down -.-""" so dumb, but really la and geography!!! the chairs in the LT were damn noisy lah somebody shld oil them can, cos they creak whenever you just shift abit so extremely irritating oh yah but geography ..well it's erm it's sorta like my first paper in sec three so it's okay! i'm sure it'll get better with time -.-" okay okay, jia you!! ps: my neck aches like hell lah, cos all the tables in the LT were slanted and our necks had to like bend at an angle to do the test properly ohhh how can i forget to blog about our class dinner at thai express not to mention it was terribly expensive but it was very nice! not exactly the food, but they were quite nice too, but more of the whole class thing really liked my class a lot =D ohhhhhhhhhh somemore ..somebody complimented me on my diao look michelle said "sokmui! that's a very good diao look you just did" what a thing to be complimented about and somebody said i have a good killer look (again) seriously, am i really that killerish or have you guys secretly spread rumors about me behind my back?? this came out for my lit unseen i'm sure you guys will love it. i did warning to children children, if you dare to think of the greatness, rareness, muchness, fewness of this precious only Endless world in which you say You live, you think of things like this: Blocks of slate enclosing dappled Red and green enclosing tawny Yellow ets, enclosing white and black acres of dominoes Where a neat brown paper parcel Tempts you to untie the string. In the parcel a small island, On the island a large tree, On the tree a husky fruit. Strip the husk and pare the rind off: In the kernel you will see Blocks of slate enclosed by dappled Red and green, enclosed by tawny Yellow nets, enclosed by white and black acres of dominoes Where the same brown paper parcel- Children, leave the string untied! For who dares undo the parcel Finds himself at once inside it, On the island, in the fruit, Blocks of slate about his head, Finds himself enclosed by dappled Green and Red, enclosed by yellow Tawny nets, enclosed by black And white acres of dominoes, With the same brown paper parcel Still untied upon his knee. And, if he then should dare to think of the fewness,muchness,rareness Greatness of this endless only precious world in which he says he lives-he then unties the string ..wonderful isn't it? i spent like ten mins simply reading the poem den wrote my first paragraph something about this poem is directed to children den realized how stupid that sounds so i started again this time outrightly stating that upon reading the poem, the first feeling you'll get is GIDDY ........... craaaap haha but literature was definitely more fun den econs -.-" oh, and i can't make myself study math and geog howww oh yahh..must thank so many people for ur smses i can't write all ur names out lah but thank you guys anyway =D oh, and my SECOND birthday present (first was junru's) is from NAOMI! a beautiful birthday cake BOX, mind you, no cake, only got box she decorated it very nicely though and aaaaaaaaaaa...............PORK CHOP you read that one correct as in, it's a huge pig almost as big as MOMO but MOMO is cuter i lugged it home den my mom said "why you birthday always get pig, people think you look like one?" so flattering eh? but i dunno how much it costs lah, must be quite ex right THANK YOU NAOMI! =DDDD ok shit i can't tear my eyes away from f.paul.wilson's book ..shit how to study like this it's math tml!!! ..and my h ands are itching to call pris. ok, just for a while ..damn hellllo everyone today is the first day of second semester!! surprisingly in high spirits i think i shocked everyone today with my cheerfulness =D despite the fact that ....eeks, gp and econs are goner as in, i'll definitely pass >.> just that pass with very ugly marks nia it's fine, i totally feel very happy -.-" you noe i finished my econs paper the WHOLE paper one hour ahead of time cos i wasn't wearing my specs and misread the time like what shit la no wonder so many people aroundme were lazing on the table i tot they had given up turns out there were more than enough time laaa bluff me i feel cheated anyway i realize that taking exams for arts is really like...quite.. i dunno how to say quite "not an event" like for science exams are like a big thing den must do a lot of preparations but for arts subjects, for some reasons i feel damn slack =DDD huh, episode 130 ichigo? den what's the pt of watching???? and asou is nice, not shuai, he not considered shuai yet but he's nice =DD the weather is so unbearably HOT!! oh man..go and on air-con.. i just said something absolutely idiotic to mg.. her nick was "when you wish you don't have a head" apparently she has a headache and i said..what's the next line, "look for sok mui?" ok okay i'm a bit too high today gonna try to study literature today hey, shall we try something? not study for lit and see whether we can get a decent score hahaha for this once i tot jc was fun =D ...ironic right, got exams den fun ... ohhhh i almost forgot THANK YOU JUNRU! for ur early birthday present ..but honestly i dun use hp pouch lehh but thank you anyway i'll stuff it full of socks during christmas or something...... >.> １リットルの涙 1 Litre of Tears Tribute
omg..i cried while watching this video (again) pls pls pls watch it!!! i totally gave myself an off day today for two main reasons one: my eyes were too damn swollen..i think i'll go blind if i even scan the pile of geography notes two: COS I NEED A BREAK even when studying for arts is actually quite enjoyable so anyway i woke up feeling weird all over and finally realize it's cos my eyes were swollen and red and can't open properly i literally cried till 2am and cried one litre of tears FOR ONE LITRE OF TEARS my god she's so brave la it's a really must watch show after watching you'll feel...erm what, inspired? not the word, but haiya, you'll feel something and if you dun cry right, i think they missed a gene when making you it's really that touching oh and the asou haruto mg? i tot he's just a made-up character they added in when they shoot the show..but turns out he wasn't!! omg..having that kinda boyfriend..is like the ultimate le what else can you ask for and even though in the end he didn't propose (i tot he would..but he didn't) somehow..like i feel..they are already sorta married it's the equivalent isn't it like isn't the marriage vow something like what staying with each other through illness and poverty or something if already did all of those things what, even without being bind by a vow and throughout the whole show, there were no hugs kisses or even hand holding somehow it just makes it so...even more touching i dunno how to put it la i love one of his statements la zhi yao shi ni shuo de hua, bu guan duo me man wo dou hui yong xing de qu ting something like that loosely translated meaning so long as you're the one talking, no matter how slowly, i'll listen with all my heart like......AWWW wa biang, i cried like shit last night and the parents also sniffs* the whole family also sniffs sniffs* .............. must watch la!! really you wun regret watching it de nods nods* and must thank mg for telling me abt the show =DD thank u!! EH! additions to my birthday list!!! # one litre of tears vcd/dvd # one litre of tears OST # AYA'S DIARY............ she's like so damn brave and courageous and all those positive things and she tried so hard simply to live on and continuing to write her diary ..sigh i dun think i'll ever be as brave as her you noe i heard of this ..thought..before compared to a person who did a brave thing without thinking about it, one is even braver when you know you are afraid but you still did it inspiring?? WATCHONE LITRE OF TEARS okay see pris wants me to do this IDEAL BIRTHDAY GIFT(s) AND IDEAL BIRTHDAY kinda post .. but the problem is she wants my gift to be affordable ..but IDEAL leh how can it possibly be affordable?? now she's giving me the -.-" look and hey people, no excuses, you get to meet me on speech day i WAN PRESENTS OKAY i might not rmb my birthday at this rate (what with exams and shit) but i'll definitely rmb on that day so you better give me somethng better than a handshsake on that day understand?? okay pris just changed the name le it's called "IDEAL AFFORDABLE GIFTS" okay loh #1 cheese cake, cheese cake cheese cake #2 a walk to remember DVD #3 yu mei ren vcd (if you can find it..i doubt u can) #4 phantom of the opera musical box (it's only twenty eight dollars lah) (but i dunno where got sell le..online?) #5 that super nice necklace i saw at causeway point selling at twelve bucks BUT THE BOOTHE HAS SHIFTED!! BUT I REALLY WANTED THAT NECKLACE!! WHINES* #6 you to sponsor a child for 1.50 per day! www.worldvision.org.sg =DD #7 moulin rouge dvd #8 MOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMO and please i want a well nourished one, not those like after famine momo pris naomi and i saw at the kiddy palace at causeway #9 anything nice at the two very nice shops of PARKWAY PARADE BASEMENT=D #10 avocado juice! for free! queenstown de! #11 two hundred pounds beauty soundtrack!! #12 i can't think le, what else do i like?? #13 if you noe my taste just buy me some nice necklaces can le la #14 some nice tee shirts and blouses? #15 if you make this happen it'll be great...MOTHER TO GO OVERSEAS FOR A DAY? no lah KIDDING MY IDEAL BIRTHDAY SETTING=DDD I WAN TO HAVE DINNER WITH ALL MY FRIENDS! TOGETHER!! and i wan to go kbox!! like at night den after that we can go eat crap together at some ulu playground with swings and talk all night=DDDD okay, just for the heck of it let's draw up some invitations first group #1 peixian #2 gary #3 weilun #4 meigui #5 priscilla #6 naomi second group #1 ruth #2 cybil kumboon lijie all those in vj de third group #xinyun #melissa #cass #yilling #kenneth #vannesa liu!! oh it'll be nice to meet the famine camp people too.. but i lost their contacts le =( .. erm i can't think of anything else le la okay right to mg: i'll be at the woodlands library for ALL days striaght la most like till like six or seven pm in the evening drop by for a visit! =D i'll be even happier if you are willing to share with me that expensive chocolate pastry they are selling..looks super tasty but they're charging astronomical sum for it tsk and to mg again: ALL YOUR FAULT LA i watch even faster than you la, six episodes at a go cos i sorta skipped over some parts.. the father is so cute, the mother is so nice, the daughter is so typically a smaller sis that she's cute, and of course the bro is cute and AYA IS SO CUTE TOO sob .. i mean, the true story is so damn sad and that disease is so damn cruel can you imagine, you can understand everything that is going on but you can't respond and move it's like being trapped within your own body that's really sad so yep, me and mg are donating our tears to Aya, sigh okay okay just to make you guys jealous i accomplished something again!!! pris took me to an ulu kfc which we had to walk quite a distance in the hot sun but in the end it doesn't matter where we were, cos it was productive! well i got through half of my human geography materials ..i mean, i got through it la but whether or not anything went in ..that's not my prob right i did my best!!! oh man, feeling very full now shouldn't be eating le budden...there's some tempting leftover food on the table.. oh crap la oh..err to who ah, xinyun oh yes, i oweher an entry cos she's such a weird person dun worry , i'll dedicate one to you ohh see, i'm not trying to get you to fail your common test people but ONE LITRE OF TEARS IS REALLY NICE go search on crunchyroll or youtube and WATCH ..erm, for people like xinyun, i think you better ignore this advertisement later really fail because n ever study dun come and look for me hor oh man i should have started earlier -.-" die shit la you noe i thought it should be okay while doing the a level tys cos the questions are..okay what den i started doing vj papers ..den i went "uh oh" math revision left with trigo and those hyperbolas, ellipse that shit like die ah i can't memorise trigo formulas and those hyperbolas make me wanna play hoola hoop like...hoooolalalalala die big time neh somemore i STILL haven't started on human geography ..SHIT AHHH i dun wan fail geography for the first time -.-"""" i dun wan dun wan dun wan wa lao eh, but i really can't mug twenty four hours aday la so all my day is devoted to mugging..den night watch a lot alot of shows.. normally will take out one hr or two in the night to do one paper den watch shows so here i am after doing one vj paper and feeling utterly devastated and utterly irritated that mg has influenced me to watch the j drama ..one litre of tears it's really quite sad .. so i figured since we have the means to go to sch, can write can think can move we should do our bestest for our exams yeah? ..aza aza then yah okay okay i realized i haven't been updating since the famine camp which come to think of it, it's only been four days la impatient meigui, can't wait to see my lovely entry is it? okay, before i talk about how fabulous famine camp has been let me just do this OH MAN DIE LAH, ONE MORE WEEK TO MID YRS ..BLOODY SHIT WHY DUN WE JUST COMMIT SUICIDE AND BURN ALL THE NOTES?? yep, if you guys wanna find me or anything, it's easy, just pop into woodlands library cafe galilee and lala, you'll find me there i patronize the damn cafe everyday, and i think it's about time i get that darn discount card, cos seriously, every drink costs like one kfc meal budden right, it's really very conducive so study there ..free air con, free weird couples to watch (you noe those who pretend that their asses are so small they can squeeze onto one chair together and still attempt to cram stuff into their brains which unlike their asses, are really pea-sized) so anyway, been going to the library and studying cos i realize home is TOO comfortable -.-" sigh me yanyu naomi all agree that we're so screwed..studied five hrs today..den came home for dinner, thought i would go there in the night again to study functions but..argh, you noe, five hrs of cafe galilee is rather enough so yep, gonna watch two hundred pounds beauty dvd later, do functions, den i'll watch bleach 129 (yay, mg's my free bleach update portal) okay okay, here goes on famine camp IT ROCKS it's not like any dumb camp, and seriously the most stupid camp i've ever been to is that stupid stpuid dairy farm sec three camp they should rename it as the oily-plates-screaming-facilitators-cannot-bathe-boot-camp really famine camp was FUN!! erm, as usual there are some people whom i dun really get why they are there cos like, not really taking it seriously i guess but come to think of it, no one starves themselves for thirty hrs just for the sake of starving, or okay unless they're perverse or something so i figured everyone of us there believes at least A LITTLE in the cause of it which is to ERADICATE poverty okay okay, i'm going to turn into charity incarnated or something but honestly the camp can do that to you, they dun like brainwash you with cliche speeches like "the world is really cham, people are starving, children are dying, you guys should know to cherish stuff and yadayada" but it's more like through the activites and all lah okay, just to make it clearer, i'll go through it chronilogically ..actually quite lazy to do it but i promised myself i'll blog about it so you guys would go next year =D first activity, sorta, they played this super lame ice breaker which of course didn't break any ice den we were sorted into "families" around eight or nine people each family got one family head la den got children, and parents and adults after which they assigned "roles" like, some people were HIV positive, you had to wear this black ugly plastic bag shirt over yourself and stick a bloody big sticker that says "HIV AIDS" one was crippled, you had to walk aroudn the WHOLE day tied to a "healthy person" one was blinded, you really had to stick something over one eye one was mute, and they really wanted you to slap a masking tape over your mouth, like ewww okay, so basically, we were competing in countries mah, me and yanyu were in cambodia like, HIV people has to go to the hospital to get injections every hr if not you either die or.something la den the rest of the people you have to get educated, get jobs, earn money, get vaccinated and get water and food supply they had set up stations that say school, hospital, job center and all lah wa lao, the queues were bloody long den when you almost reach the front? they stupid guy using the loud speaker said "school's closed!!" and grinned happily was actually quite irritating but after that we realize this IS what's going out there in the world like even if you queue for aids, you might not get it, it's how frustrating it is and you have to work hard to get anything you wan like the water supply, me and yanyu had to lug cartons of water up and down up and down the flights of stairs before they give you the coupon "construction" job - doing wheel barrow and yanyu piggyback me up the stairs-.-" she said i was light =D some healthy life style shit above vaccination, thirty pushups thirty sit ups and to pass math student as an education standard, they asked you to do math sums using calculator haven finish using calculator upside down interesting nia? and the farming job made the people pick up red beans or some beans i think from the grass, which was wet after raining but it was really fun la oh and there were illegal jobs like prostituting where you hug a pillar that says "for sale" and pray to hell you dun get caught cos if you do, they declare you HIV positive and ur country's in trouble and that kinda thing got drug dealer..organ dealer.. erm..oh yah, after that we all sat down for a this talk with ly long (how to spell ah correct right?) he's a fifteen year old boy from cambodia, den we saw this video which shows us how xing ku living in cambodia is, like they can't go to school and every morning him and his siblings have to go scavenge for waste materials which they later sell for one sing dollar they invited him and his mother over and really, you can tell how happy his mother is she's like smiling and smiling and like very embarassed and nervous. she wore very simple or even like very old clothes, beige colored and all and kept fidgeting around one of the campers went up to like wish them all the best and everything but wind up crying and the mother cried too it was really quite touching ly long's father had took up drinking, and yep, turned his back on the family that's why life had been so hard and you noe watching the mother, it really puts things into perspective after that they wanted us to reflect on what the whole day had been for us they switched off the lights, we were in this big hall and everyone of us had a small candle, those they put in candle holders de? and consecutively put the lighted candles in the middle of our groups den slowly the facilitators blew them out, until we were in the whole darkness again i noe it doesn't sound very, erm, what, inspiring, but when you are there, i think everyone felt something (okay besides the people who were giggling) but yah, we feel sleepy lah, duh, it's darkness but i think everyone felt something too the candles symbolize every chlid's life on the planet which was plagued in darkness and difficulty every lighted candle symbolizes hope but when they were blown out so easily, i think we all realizes how fragile life is like when there was only ONE candle left at the far end of the hall it's just one candle, but somehow its light can be felt on our side think about that okay, the next day basically started with this wonderwoman doing workouts with us-.-" she's really quite amazing but you noe her breathing sounds ..sound...erm sexually disturbing den we went tampiness to collect newspaper..came back and count down to break fast second day was more like action..first day was more reflectative i guess whoa, long post hadn't really said what i wanted to say our family wasn't erm..i guess as bonded as we would have liked but ultimately, dunno why, i like these people they got our emails lah, still waiting for them to add us ah, my fingers very tired..next time okayy tml got famine camp think it'll be quite fun i hope la px says it's fun so should be quite alright i just noticed they didn't require us to bring clothes maybe the twenty bucks we paid include those la ..and you noe everyone's slacking like mid yrs are coming soon la and everyone is still slacking like shit we are like major slackers here omggggg *glances at econs and math* ..might as well fail.. like sigh, we should all morph into those rebellious jap teens for a change and just heck care books and studies ..but obviously we can't cos we are SINGAPOREANS sighhh oh met up with naomi and pris today i think they stimulate each others' retardness seriously, they are like super ruo zhi with each other around but it was nice =D okay..erm, tonight's schedule.. (no more bleach to watch..aww) (i'm thinking of watching my girl on crunchy roll..maybe after exams la) ..erm, read newsweek..i realize that surprisingly, when i'm in school i read it more regularly, hols i just dump it one side ..erm, read through econs and geography?? oh..okay i noe, research physical geog case studies SIGHH okay okay gtg meigui sprained her ankle again! due to my horrible curse so sad la anyway, get well soon! the bandages look nasty it's been proven i officially spoiled my piano it's that stupid piece, that stupid rondo piece the lower F sharp key is now officially retired i think the string broke inside i dun think anyone of you would ever understand how angry i am right now playing my piano makes me damn angry it sounds horrible it feels horrible the piece is shit i feel like screwing every single key i feel like using an screwdriver to screw throw it so that it screams in pain cos my own ears feel painful playing the damn piano and i really hate talking to my parents about the piano it's practically talking to retards i noe it's bad to say that of your parents but really they're retards they dun understand the fact that yes, the piano was bought at five thousand dollars and FACE THE FUCKING TRUTH THAT IT SUCKS AND YOU'VE BEEN DOPED AND I CAN'T STAND BEING AROUND IT SO MUCH SO THAT I'M BEGINNING TO POUND IT EVERYTIME I PLAY i can't fucking play a proper piece you noe and my restlessness and frustrations and everything is showing i'm fucking fucking fucking FUCKING sian of this dumb piano right now you would have thought i would have developed feelings for it after so many yrs yah i did the feeling of wanting to bian it feeling damn rebellious dun wanna study feel like searching for a fight or a quarrel fucking sian and it's even more sian of talking about this to my mom do you have any idea the AGONY of playing on such a piano where every note sounds like it's being drawn out from a tight rusted line of iron it's like i'm clenching my teeth everytime i play it den my mother say i shouldn't play when my father is asleep BUT HELLO YOU THINK PLAYING PIANO DUN NEED MOOD IS IT YOU NOE I REALIZE I HAVEN'T BEEN LIKE PRACTISING MY PIANO PROPERLY SINCE THE STUPID THING WAS MOVED OUT??? cos when i wanna play my father is sleep ing when i dun wanna play he's awake (@(#$@&#$&@ #"(%y!#&@$@"(!@&$@&$":#&@#$!@3 IT FUCKING SUCKS it's like reaching a block and i can't push past it all my pieces are stagnant my own hands seem stagnant like no improvement no nth and now i'm just pounding away at my laptop like at my piano cos i seriously feel like punching someone maybe you all would think i'm exaggerating but if i throw you a lousy pen that squeaks and leaks and produces ugly ink youwould properly throw it at the floor and give up studying same reason and having looked my past years mid yr econs paper i grew even angrier cos i kept thinking why the hell didn't vj teachers give us more practise? you noe the only essay we did till now is ONE STUPID ONE FOR A TEST?? we haven't had any prac and then it's mid yrs like they always say what if you understand then it's gd enough HELLO IT'S NOT GD ENOUGH i'm inflexible okay? i'm traditional, i prefer practise and why are you making us sit for a god damn exam when i dun even noe what the hell to do with the question fucking shit i feel like just screwing it and tearing up my notes and just shove it aside what's the point must be that goukusen so many rebellious kids makes me feel rebellious as well but seriously, they must be feelng so much more angry and frustrated and bitter over this stupid world but they didn't really film that way i think i should take up graffiti or something to vent all my anger you should hear the songs i impromptu-ed when i'm angry it's all very twentieth century ..can someone take away all this anger it's making me.....................................reckless Everyone feels despondent at times and you are no exception. You are feeling so depressed because it seems that everything that could go wrong has gone wrong and you don't quite know which way to turn. So like the proverbial ostrich you are trying to bury your head in the sand. But that won't work - you have to face reality. You are looking for excitement and stimulation and you are ready to try anything - but be careful not to take too many risks. You know what you want and you are very dogmatic and demanding - especially in your emotional demands. You have specific ideas and beliefs and if these beliefs are not realised you can become extremely frustrated. You may not be that perfect but you are looking for perfection with the perfect partner. You are presently experiencing excessive stress as a result of self-restraint. You act and think differently from the common herd and you want to be liked and admired for yourself and to associate with people who feel and act as you do. Because of this need to be self-reliant and to break away from mediocrity, you are finding this situation most uncomfortable and you are experiencing considerable anxiety - perhaps even more than you feel the capacity to cope with. You need to find a 'soul mate', someone whose standards are as high as your own - but where? Keep on searching... The situation is uncomfortable and you would like to break away from it, but you refuse to compromise with your opinions. You are unable to resolve the situation because you are continually postponing the making of necessary decisions. You are stubborn but this is no deterrent to a happy life, so why drop your standards. Think positively, everything will work out. It has worked out successfully for you in the past and it will again in the future. The tensions induced by trying to cope with conditions which are beyond your capabilities, or your reserves of strength, have led to considerable anxiety and a sense of personal inadequacy. Your inability to take control of the situation causes you to over-react in stubborn defiance blaming everyone but yourself for your own failures. well...having took pris's recommended test.. it's actually quite true except till the part i get the feeling he's trying to criticize me as blaming all others except myself -.-" that got me a little .....ahem okay, be back soon i think if i continue playing the piano it'll like spoil soon i already spoiled the F key cos i kept pounding on it had a fun day playing with px but for some reason after reaching home and bathing i found myself pounding the damn piano cos it sounds simply HORRIBLE IT SOUNDS SO FREAKING SHIT CAN and even now i feel like clawing it my fingertips are already peeling cos i went overboard literally pounded and claw it cos the sound pisses me off damn much and i realize i'm STAGNANT i can't learn any pieces my teacher give me i literally can't learn them cos for some reason i'm anti-them and i'm so pissed off at myself ARGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH i think my neighbors think i'm siao cos i pounded for so long and composed some weird twentieth century music those freaky weird kind and i'm STILL STILL STILL VERY VERY VEYR SIAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE MY PIANO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! okay in response to the ultra cool emo essay done by vanessa liu on www.stinkingcamel.blogspot.com i've decided to contribute one short paragraph to her essay (since she claims to run outta ideas) Emo is also a new weapon used by those ultra irritating girls you see on the streets who yearns to be captured on film and hopefully "kope" the lead actress role in an ou xiang ju (co starring some other pretty face of course). This weapon is extremely deadly and fatal, especially to unsuspecting young boys. How do they "work it" as we say? First off, the state of "emo" sets in and takes them body and soul. They become quiet, lonely, or mysterious as they hope to be and develops an aura of "i'm having a problem, i dun wanna talk about it, but i wan you to ask about it". You can almost hear the sad music radiating in the atmosphere and as they gaze towards the far off star strewn sky, you can feel their utmost desire for LOVE and CARE and HIM. Female creatures are unusually adept at identifying this weapon and dismiss the emo creature with disgust and contempt (they can emo for all i care) Male creatures however, for some reason, fails to develop immunity for this weapon and ALAS! let it invade theirs system. Their empathetic natures cause them to reach out to these beautiful mysteriously and puzzling emo creatures and attempt to caress them, comfort them, cure them of their emo problems. When this happens, the emo creatures have succeeded! and continues to wrap their fingers around the well deserved male creatures, milking tears from their eyes, continue to gaze downcast at the ground, and the thing that works best, drawing a blank look into their eyes so that the male slaves continue to worship their devoted love, heartfelt pain and swooning, they vow to protect her forever and ever. (note, i'm not shooting melissa haha, cos girls tend to really get emo sometimes, but some girls really really milk it you noe) just paste mg's that blog entry found it extremely meaningful anyway, the trip to malacca was.......erm not really rechargeful nor entire very very fun but it felt really good to get away from socialising and singapore as my brother said when we got back to singapore "wa lao, back to this no life country" quite true really can you imagine my horror when i woke up this morn (one night back from malacca) to realize i have had a nightmare about homework and mid years?? goes to show how irritating mid years are and oh man, i just realized that unless i mug twenty four hours a day, i'm bound to do badly for at least one subject mannnnnnnn aza aza!!! and to vanessa (IP de) (cos i noe you and another vanessa liu) : CHEER UP! guys are jerks and especially THAT one who can't understand us =D If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion? Read the next question before looking back at this question again. It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are the facts about the three candidates. Candidate A:Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologist. He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day. Candidate B:He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening. Candidate C:He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.Which of these candidates would be your choice? Decide first before scrolling down to look at the response .Candidate C? Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.Candidate B is Winston Churchill.Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.And if you answer to the first question is Yes, you just killed Beethoven. after spending nearly fifteen minutes, our darling priscilla has finally decided that we can't come up with a good decent title for our EE (without sounding like she's hua chi and i just got dumped) thus we shall just write normally of course, my part will be about why guys are irritating pris will be writing about why guys are great (so she can flaunt about her 10a1s) right, here we go #1 guys are irritating cos they are super petty, they have so much energy in the world to get angry like ten times a day over little peanut things...... #2 after they get angry, they forgot about it, like wow! #3 guys are super weird, this man in the ICA building brought four pairs of specs and kept changing them, as if it's gonna make a difference in your passport photo, hello, you still looki ugly #4they profess their love for one girl for eternity, but they do it several times, each time after they get dumped #5 they really really feel hurt after getting dumped and we poor souls have to comfort them even though we all know they'll find a replacement very quickly #6 they decide they have all the time in the world to return a sms #7 they just DUN get it when you say you're sick of him #8 they like to show the world what's called love, by kissing your girlfriend slowly while caressing her while waiting for your turn to update your passport photo, as if it's the most romantic place in the world #9 they just refuse to get off your ass, stalking you around when you really dun feel like talking #10 on the other hand, when you DO wanna talk, they're never around i can go on and on but really, guys suck why do so many girls bother??? i'm totally disgusted seriously, we're on a totally different wavelength altogether right, actually got a lot of "inspiring" stuff to talk about but..see lah, this entry gets me caught up i offended someone again and priscilla laughed out loud when i said alot of people thinks i'm having attitude problem ....... actually i do think i'm attitude-ing them but, not without reason, you dun see me attitude weilun gary peixian pris mg naomi they all pur lease i dun have that much spare energy .............. later, go blog hop den maybe i'll be inspired to inspire you right i can't believe i have to go to school every single day next week ..how's that for a spoiler but too bad, we have a CONCERT to prepare for and i really doubt i can play well but oh man, who cares right, no one cares ..okay now i'm sounding sacarstic, and unreasonable ..forget it my second bro is currently at kbox..and is gonna be there till 2am like, really surprised, and quite happy really haha, cos surprisngly, we share a similar interest okay fine, i inherit my tastes from him mostly and shit, i lost my train of thought again ...oh yah, pris you sound so sad lately! dun be so sad! it's really true lah, you might really think that this chess thing is the most important thing right now and that you'll really regret it and all (i'm not trying to sound condescending hor) but in the end ultimately after a few months, you'll look back and shake your head and said "was it really worth me getting so upset?" cos i did that too, over volleyball you wouldn't believe but for a few months even in sleep i thought of how to play it better but after all these years, you'll find out what's really important then for me, it wasn't the fact that i couldn't play well enough more like the experience which taught me..i dunno, not to take bullshit from too many people but haiya, relax! your birthday coming soon (ok a month) and we owe you cheese cake!! smile!! and think of 10A1s if worst comes to worst -.-" ..and ugly betty this episode..really erm well ..really, shows the ugly side of each human being?? right, and my hair looks chopped serious, like, really chopped but somehow i like it better this way ..okay fine, maybe i like it better cos it reflects my mood better argh dunno la feeling quite luan now oh, and it wasn't until i woke up this morn den i realize there's blood crusted to my small toe courtesy of waitressing yesterday ..luckily, the wound has almost healed cos i have another job on tue ..wonderful ain't it ahh ok ok, fine bye bye and .. can we PLEASE get together to do something fun you know i realize i should probably thank god that my second bro isn't the guai guai type if not i'd have been locked outta home like so many gazillion times (who uses gazillion this word anyway) i'm back from waitressing and alive and still kicking as you can see the people there were still busy busy busy busy like, no time to look up and smile even as we cross paths but well, to be honest, i had enough on my hands (literally) to bother socialising with them there are a few nice aunties who tried to help i think but honestly, i realli think unless you have strong resistance, dun hold such a job when you are old ..it makes you grouchy so anyway, the waitressing part wasn't all that hard cos some people from my tables didn't turn up, so i saved some effort and after some time, you sorta get the "pattern" so serving and clearing plates are kinda easy too ..oh i forgot to mention the feet right??? yep they hurt LIKE MAD i realize that my plaster wasn't working too late and i realize that i forgot to cut my nails again which m eans they are cutting into each other like, extreme pain la but still, have to keep moving anyway, i didn't stay behind to kope the free food first, cos i really wanna get home second, i really dun wanna go home together with them and wind up being on the same train as them cos we have zilch to talk about third, i really dun fancy eating food when my feet hurts like shit fourth, i think there's a reason why the guests all didn't touch the he ye fan much fifth, i just didn't feel like it(me being the unsociable me) so yep, i literally limped back to the station, stopped at 7 eleven for a drink and along the way seeing many "pai kias" but somehow feeling quite friendly towards them (must be the wedding dinner which were filled with too many guai people) and to my dismay the damn train was so extremely crowded who says singaporeans dun have a night life huh? so yeah, on the train, i i was switching weight from left to right right to left so that i can take turns resting my feet but what i really wanna do, was to take off the shoes and there's this indian man, he held the pole, and he held it with his arm striaght out and refused to budge, cos i think he was trying to make a point, there was a chinese bei bei leaning his whole body on the pole so that i coculdn't hold so i just kept standing behind the indian man, cos his straight arm serves as this like barrier and honestly, i didn't have problem with keeping balance, cos my feet felt like dead solid heavy lead ..make that bleeding lead oh, and hurt lead den at amk SOMEBODY finally got off her seat and this quite cute guy let me have the seat even though can tell he's quite tired uh no, of course not, i didn't even look at his face, he didnt' look at mine imagine *seat empties* me look longingly at the seat *pause one second* during which the guy shifts slightly outta the way me shamelessly usurp the seat so yeah, khatib the seat next to me emptied and he sat down i was kinda dozing, waking up to see him next to me and HE was like dead to the world even though he only sat down seconds ago like, totally DEAD to the world la, i noe cos i'm often like that after sch den he was swaying swaying towards me -.-" that's why i noe he was tired so i got down at admiralty and left him still swaying-.-" nice guy, can tell he wasn't out late cos he was wooing girls and imagine my disgust when i saw the LONG QUEUES at mac i mean, yah, people like supper but wasn't this TOO MUCH? i was REALLY hungry and wanted to buy shaker fries so i decided nope, go home and realize tat if i limped home at this rate, i might get there when hell freezes over so let me proudly tell you what i did i very xiao-sha de took off my shoes got this couple walked past and i think the guy noticed i was dangling my court shoes which meant i was walking bare footed so cool right i did it the last time too it was too damn painful and once the shoes were off, they were FREED like, ,totally FREED and really, if you do it sometime too, you'll noe there's nth quite wrong with it cos singapore is really clean only got dust, some small rock fragments and of course dun step on vomit la, someone was vomitting at the mrt there but other than that, it's really clean and quite comfortable -.-" and i am eternally grateful for my second bro for his bad habit of staying up late cos it meant that calling his hp entails him coming to unlock the door for me at that time i found him cute moments later, when i found him finishing his mee, i found him disgusting ..there was nth left for me i only had MILO to sustain me like, sigh sad okkk i dunno why i wanted to blog but blog i did (why am i talking like charles dickens) so yep, off to SLEEEEEEP twenty seven bucks not that hard to earn la, it's the feet oh pris's blog is getting more and more complicated oww i'll blog abt it tml for now.............SLEEP so sorry priscilla that i made you feel so complicated (which i admit females are) due to my post but seriously i also having mood swings now oh man i'm feeling emo and it's cos of a dumb reason okay fine not very dumb but..no one can understand if i talk in riddles here so i'll just say it's the thing only mg noes so yah i'm feeling emo and it's one of those days whereby i just wanna sit and stare yah seriously and oh, i noe exactly how you feel priscilla really really really i do everyone reaches it sometimes now i'm like, reaching this stagnant point in piano dunno how to tell you and i realize i cannot make any sense of the dumb rondo piece we're playing for COMPETITION it's freaking fast, freaking loud, freaking no melody and i have no idea what the hell i'm supposed to potray i think it's somewhere along the lines of cheerful, playful, mischievious cos those are the words mr ku used to teach us ...but seriously i dun see how mischievious it is and i seriously think i play like shit like, when you play, there's two kind, one when your fingers simply play two when your mind actually understood what your fingers are supposed to do me? i dun even get the feeling of the song, how to play ..ARGH and we have a bloody competition ..which is like.....sian and i tend to be very ji, very urgent, and doesn't stay on beat but it's really me, my character i'm that way fi you ask me to play those ultra slow emo songs right unless i noe what is the story behind, if not i'll really fall asleep shit la almost seven feeling sick and strengthless and just dun wanna carry on SIANN pris aza aza! thirsty |
